emo day

i shudnt be on9 at this hour.. supposed to be studying, working hard... but, i muz release.. well, sth happened today, or nth at all... i feel like i 'm waiting for sth... which myself oso dunno wat... like sudden lonesome has engulfed me... or wat i always say, void in the sole.. it started off as usual, happy day... until... i oso not sure... mood swing.. n den, tears came out from my eyes.. has been happening quite often lately..

lately i hv decided, to becum doctor, i dunno whether i can make it anot, but this is my ambition for now. i hv nvr been so determined and confirmed b4.. when shu xian was asking me, if u cant be doctor... i said i would dunno wat else to do in my life... n den, i heard sum stories from my mom, bout sum1 just passed away.. so, sumhow this add onto my emoness.. den, i was watching the seiries, very sad n sentimental scene... extra emo

jus now i read ah wei's blog. she said" i will feel lonely, not becos i am wandering alone at else where, but the tot of no one is waiting for me back at home.." this feeling is so empty, so void, like loss of hope in life.. like this song "travelling soldier" by Dixie Chicks. very soothing music, but the lyrics, is a story bout a girl, waiting for a a soldier to cum back home. they juz met once, in a bar, while the man is waiting for the truck to take him into the army camp to come. den, he told this girl he just met:"i bet u hv a boyfren, but i dun care, i need sum1 to send a letter to.." in a way, he has no one waiting for his return, n he needed sum kind of emotional clutch... however, he didnt make it home. when his name was read at a memorial, nobody cares, except for a young lady, hiding in a corner, crying...